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:World of Oblivion:
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Thursday, January 26, 2012Day 2Packing her stuff just brings back so many emotions... When i packed her clothes, i realised that i've promised to give her a space yet until this very day, her clothes is still mixed together with mine in my wardrobe.. I used to grumble that all her stuff has taken over a large portion of my drawer.. but when i collected them from my drawer, there were only 4 bottles.. All these while i never really pay attention to all these little detials, i've been too engrossed with myself, my social life and never really spared a thought for her All i ever did was grumble, quarrel and made life very difficult for her.. and never once did she ever left me, always being patience and tolerating my nonsense.. I've never given her the status and the respect that she well deserve and taking advantage of her time and again.. She has always questioned me as to why am i treating her unlike the way i treated my ex-gf ... i always avoided the qns because i didnt feel any differences.. but having gone 2 days without her by my side.. i sat down and think.. i realised that here is a girl who will take care of me no matter what happens, who supported me in whatever i do and who have given up a lot of things for me... On the other hand, in my previous r/s i had to give up my social life because my world just evolved around my gf... I didn't realised how fortunate i was till i lost her.. I know i should be moving on since she has already started to move on... I hope i can.. Louis froze in time on 9:31 PM
Wednesday, January 25, 2012It might not be the most sincere way of apologizing but I really don't know what else can I do...I'm really sorry for hurting you time and again. Maybe you're right, i don't love you as much as you do. Throughout the years, i've forgotten what love really is. To me love means carrying out my duties whether i like it or not and that's the reason why our relationship couldn't make it. When we choose to end it, i knew it wasn't on impulse, as much as we love each other, we hated each other as well. Our problems have escalated to the extend that every time we quarrel, i will avoid it. Many a times, I choose to keep quiet because i don't want us to quarrel and hope the problem slips away quietly. If you ask me, what are the problems that we have? I really don't know... to me nothing seem to be the problem, and this attitude itself is the problem. I'm sorry for putting you down in front of your friends... I'm not a good boyfriend and I don't deserve the love and support that you've showed me over the years. I woke up this morning and I felt lost... For the first time in nearly 3 years, i've lost the strength to do anything.... you were my pillar of support that i've took advantage of time and again... All along I knew that if anything was to happen, i can turn to you because you are my best friend, my best listener.. even though I've always laughed and make fun of you, but you were the best I can ever have.. Most of the time, I don't say things like that to you because I don't express my inner thoughts out to anyone not even to myself.. I should have told you my intention of setting up a home with you.. i know its too late to say that now...  I set this goal and showed it to everyone in Shung's group... I already had the intention to proposed to you on our anniversary this year.. I know its not use saying all this because it doesn't change anything... I would have like all other occasions ask you to reconsider and let us get back together... one of the reason why i didn't do it this time round was because i felt that i'm being unfair to you if i were to do it. I don't want to keep making empty promises... I'm sorry, I really am... I love you, Jiali and i really hope that amidst all this, you can find the strength to study for your exams, i'm sorry it has to happen now.. i rather you hate me now than to hate me forever.. Louis froze in time on 9:10 AM
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_______________ My Profile .......... Name: Louis Chin Nicknames: RuK|a Birthday: 31st Jan 1985 School: SIM UOL Horoscope: Aquarius Music
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